September 29, 2012 Comments Off on Broke

Well, nothing like being broke to make you sit up and pay attention or learn to use coupons. Broke literally. Now you’re probably wondering where did it all go? To keep the business operational, to pay off debt, pay off vendors because I have clients that don’t like to pay and well, my office manager isn’t all that good at hardcore collections, she told me herself, she’s good at soft collections. Which reminds me, clients are getting emails tonight about past due balances and that one client that owes me, well they are going to collections Monday, screw waiting til we find the contract, I mean seriously, I still have their paperwork, pay me, get it back.. Anyways, maxed out credit cards to pay one vendor although personally the fact that I had to redo all the work, kind of makes me not to want to pay her, lesson learned, she won’t be hired again. So yea, while you think you might be broke, trust me, you aint broke until you have drained your savings accounts, told your employee that you can’t pay her because there is no money and sit here wondering how the hell you’re going to buy groceries or put gas in the car. Gas in the car, hell, I can go pretty far with the tank on empty.

Today, even applied for a job teaching, two reasons, I’ve always wanted to teach, maybe not in Fairfield, but hell its an opportunity and its money because if the clients arent paying, then I need to find another source of income.

What kind of amazes me is that my credit score hasn’t gone down from paying my credit cards late, its seems to have gone up.

Broke brings about this inner calm, what can I do but relax and it smile and somehow this will pass and money will start coming in again. Nothing like getting really sick with the flu (full-blown don’t get out of bed sick) to make you realize that you’re wasting all your time working to bring in money that doesn’t come in and forgetting about your passions and dreams and goals and never having time for yourself for what? what the hell am I working so hard for, if no one is paying? Maybe its time to remember who I am, take time for myself, start writing again and generally living instead of worrying about my clients all the time, if I can’t get the work done in 8 hours, tomorrow is another day. And tomorrow, something will magically appear whether its money or some way to make it all work out.

Oh and that’s another thing, I am so over the pottery barn thing. I think I might be more shabby chic than big bulky furniture and that’s an opportunity because that bedroom set is worth some money but who knows, might keep it might not. So basically take my own advice, learn to live rich in spirit without money. I’ve done it before, I can do it again.

Categories : Free Writing